Old men have become laughingstocks in Korean society. Our status has fallen so low that I just wonder if we have the resources to make a comeback. You think I’m joking? Read this:

“There were four old men whose eyes were bloated and bruised. When asked what happened, the first man said he was punched by his wife simply because he asked her to show him her bankbooks; the second because he asked his wife why she put on makeup; the third merely because he asked his wife to give him lunch; and the last because he woke up.”

When I first heard this from my wife, I laughed uproariously, forgetting that I, as a henpecked husband, might find myself in the same boat someday. Sure enough, I soon realized I had been laughing out of the wrong side of my mouth. Since that moment, that somewhat sadistic satire has been etched into my psyche.

Recently, I came across a news report in The Korea Herald which claimed: “South Korean men spend the least amount of time on housework among the surveyed 29 members of the OECD, highlighting the persistent gender imbalance in taking household responsibilities.”

Old Korean men, myself included, might be tempted to defend ourselves by contending that we have made our country what it proudly is today. Korean women have done their fair share, too, I must say. What is encouraging, however, is nowadays more and more elderly men are trying to help with the household chores, myself included, although I must admit I am hardly in the vanguard in this regard. I believe that all of us old geezers must do more around the house, and do so joyfully. Otherwise, our marital life will continue to suffer along with our status.

So, with the new year approaching, I resolved to divide the housework more equitably. I have been helping my wife whenever possible, and trying to lift her spirits by even doing unexpected things, such as presenting her with what I called a good wife certificate. But looking back on my efforts, I think they have been rather haphazard. I need to do more.

For example, I should be doing the dishes consistently three times a day, not just after breakfast. Sadly, dishwashing is often viewed as simply a menial chore. But if cooking is an art, then so is doing the dishes, albeit perhaps to a less illustrious degree.

Arguably, washing dishes is more akin to a man’s job. It requires squeaky-clean hygiene and professionalism. I vow to be an enthusiastic dishwasher, which I hope will please my wife and, ultimately, contribute to uplifting the lowly status of old Korean men, at least under my own roof. Aprons and gloves are already there, and a cap will be the icing on the cake.

So, my fellow Korean dinosaurs, let us get to work! It is time to clean up our bruised image, and in the process, perhaps avoid fossilization.  

By Kim Haeng-jung

Kim Haeng-jung, a retired high school principal, lives in Daejeon and spends the weekends in his hometown of Dangjin, South Chungcheong Province. – Ed.